Contemplating a Shutdown

Hello everyone!

From the title you will gather that this particular post is addressing something quite specific; the potential closure of this blog.

It's been four years and what a ride it has been, but I am starting to wonder if the purpose of this blog has become skewed to the point that it would be better rebooting, or starting again, under a new banner.

Don't worry, I've not decided on anything for definite yet that I'm closing it down, it's just a thought I'm having at the moment...

Thoughts on Top of Thoughts

As many of you know by now, I have been leaving a lot of stuff upturned and open here in terms of what I've been talking about. More specifically, I have openly admitted to crushing on someone so amazing, yet seem to struggle more than I ever have with anybody else, to even say hi to her, let alone more than hi!

My breaking point came almost three weeks ago when I did something that would surely have given away now that something is going on for me towards her. I cannot say what it was on here, but I can say that my actions have brought about some rather unpleasant side-effects of broken thoughts and old thought patterns that need dealing with. Again, this won't make it on here as it's not the place to shine the spotlight on her and... well... the way she makes me feel because I've already done that.

I'm due to return to social media tomorrow, but do you know what? Right now I don't care if I ever return because I cannot put myself in a position where I feel tempted to unload a load of unhelpful stuff onto the public domain where people see me, they see my brand, and my brand is damaged irreversibly because of it. I have seen what happens when people post their drama on social media and it is not nice and it was something I swore within myself that I would never do, that I would never ever do!

So to be in a position where I'm actually tempted to? I said that my feed was designed to be that little light of hope on somebody's feed, which would cause damage faster than I could ever have imagined.

You might never understand why I've been so open on here by going into such detail about how I've crushed on someone now for over a year, but I'm not bothered if you don't, it's not your place to understand.

This is simply my blog where I am trying to find my voice in a world that needs hope now more than it ever did before!

Shock, drop & awe!