Why Are You Here? (Not An Existential, Self-Referential Crisis)

Hey!

No, this is not some kind of self-referential existential post, even if I might have admitted to an almost existential crisis last year at some point!

In today's post, I want to look at something a friend asked me on Monday, I'll keep her name out of this for now out of respect for her...

For the Girl, or For God?

Man, that's a cold way to start this post, isn't it?

I was thinking that on my way to the library today and the more I thought about it the colder it felt. I mean, I understand why I was being asked that because the day I let my feelings for someone be the driving factor behind my decision to attend a church is the day I've let it get the better of me.

Sure, I talk about it a lot, an awful lot!

But there's no harm in that, is there?

Is there?

That's a question I'm looking at and you can see in the past how I've flip-flopped about into talking about it one minute, then not the next, only to switch back again to talking about it like I am now.

I'll say it again: -

The day that I let my feelings for someone become the actual reason that I go to church is the day I've let them get the better of me!

There!

Is that better?

I go to church to see what God can do through me, just like I try to do life every single day; to see what God can do through me.

I mean, sure, I admit that I have been letting it dictate how often I go to church, but there is a difference, surely?

I knew I couldn't cut myself off altogether because, thinking back to how I was in December '15 when I was last rejected by someone, I was out of church for a month and in a very, very dark place in my life. But death is not the end of me, to quote a song by a once famous band.

Instead, I have to press on through the pain, I have to pray through the pain & most importantly of all, I have to praise through the pain, otherwise I've let my situation win!

#IWillDieBeforeIGiveUp

That was what I said last year, wasn't it? That I would literally have to die on this very spot in order for me to give up on God's greater plan for my life that is greater that my feelings for anyone could ever, ever be!

I told God & I will openly tell you, I said that this has no business getting the better of me. Sure, the feelings do sometimes, but I always come back to the fact that God would not have allowed me to go through this if He didn't have a greater & deeper lesson for me to learn through all this.

Final Thought

As I bring this post to a close today, I want you all to think about the reasons that some of you are getting up in a morning. Mine is as simple as seeing where this particular road is going because I've never been down it before.

Sure, God has shown me where I'm headed, but still the most important thing is to be enjoying the journey along the way, isn't it?

Peace!