Well, I didn't expect to see this milestone...
It doesn't feel like it, I'll tell you that much, because when I started this the original remit was to review events on the motor racing calendar. I remember it well, it ranged from the British Superbikes to Formula 1.
Looking back though now, I cringe, because some of them, alright most of them were detailed beyond belief. They must have read like instruction manuals I went through play-by-play, every incident that went on during the race.
Goodness, how I want to cringe every time I think about it!
Acknowledging All Influences
At this point, it would be foolish to fail to acknowledge that things have taken a very spiritual direction on here. I'll tell you straight; I'm not about to change that any time soon.
This is all part of the evolving vision that I have for my empire, which must be built one brick at a time. I remember in a post I made before Christmas that when it comes to building for your vision, you have to actually get started instead of just talking about it all the time.
That separates the wheat from the chaff, the cream from the sour! ;)
I've had my up's and my down's during these 304 posts, I think is the precise figure (though episode 13 of my broadcast is due out at the end of the week and I've already stacked it up!), and it's been getting easier to talk about them on here. This has offered me plenty of life-perspective, which is what I've always harped on about time and again, haven't I?
Who hasn't worn their heart on their sleeve as much as me lately?
Heart on a Tattered Sleeve
I've gone into great detail on things that maybe should have been kept to myself, but I wanted you all to see that we Christians are no better than anyone else who doesn't believe what we do. We're just as broken and messed up inside, some more than others.
It was said best that church is not meant to be a club for the social elite to come and pat each other on the back at how well they're doing, it's for the broken, the lost & the hurting to visit the Master Physician who can right all wrongs, fulfil all dreams & fight all corners at the same time.
I must say that it is so liberating to finally begin to lay down my own personal protective armour one piece at a time and to say that yes, I too am
I know some may get offended at my crossings out, but I'm just trying to show you how deep some of my scars go that make me want to use some of these inappropriate words.
In actual fact, right now, I'm fusing to this song again, I love it to bits: -
It's one of the few times I'll use the word love, aside from the love I profess for my God & also my future wife-to-be-whom-I-haven't-met.
May this be the mark of a real man, one who is not afraid to confront and deal with his emotions, as messed up as they are at times.
I cannot thank my friend, Pete, enough for just being there for me these days. All the rotting hurt I've held onto for all this time from friends who've left me and gone their separate ways, has been so noxious & toxic to me that it's taken all this time and a remarkable preach from Mark Foster that I've already mentioned before to
Final Thought
What does the future hold for me now that I've passed 300 posts? I don't know, but I'm going to continue to blog & see what crests & troughs I come up against.
I know that one day, this will all make sense, this loneliness, this burning fact that I am currently single scorching my very soul to its depths even now. Until that day, I guess I'll just keep going...
"left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot"
Until next time, bro's.
Peace off!
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