What makes you touch?
What makes you feel?
What makes you stop and smell the roses in an open field?
What makes you unclean?
'Wrong Way' by Creed
Hi,
I'm feeling in a bit of a melancholic mood right now because of certain events I've gradually been opening up about on here, so please bear with me as I work through this in the weeks ahead.
This week, I'm going to continue looking at what I raised in last week's post; what happens when we try to come up with a solution to our problem that only God can provide...
Unpack the Truth
I'm telling you, I need this right now, to keep unpacking scripture like this so that I can take an active part in applying it to my circumstances because they are challenging me and then some!
Who'd have thought that this would be the price that I would pay for admitting to a little (sic!) crush I've got on someone at my church!
Anyways, this week I'm going to reiterate a point that I made in the last post; Saul was convinced that David needed to be dressed like a soldier in order to face Goliath.
In other words, again, David was seen, by Saul, as only a young man so he would need the very best armour, in order to stand even a remote chance against the giant, Goliath.
But in David refusing and in him doing the following, as raised in this week's "60 Seconds..." broadcast, he was as good as saying "I don't need that, I'm not used to that, all I need is exactly what I'm gifted with!", wasn't he?
Telling Her
So, what I take from this is a simple fact that as much as I can take a look at how I'm crushing on someone, sometimes so bad as to leave me in tears, God knows what He is doing in allowing it to linger around for longer that it might normally have done so otherwise.
I know what you're thinking: -
You need to tell her!
You can make that statement with flashing lights and sirens blaring, but still I can't do that yet!
Right?
Right?
Am I right?!
That's what my friend Matt told me, that I need to tell her, if only to release me from this stage of my journey... but what have I said?
I barely freakin' know her so I cannot do that yet or else it might scare her off!
I'm not going to risk saying the "l" word too soon in confessing my feelings when I need to find out whether she can, or does, feel the same way about me in due course!
Twist of Barbed Wire
I find it completely comical that I can write so much about her, yet when it comes to the actual act of talking to her I freeze up so much!
I've never known it so bad in all my life and, as anyone can tell you who knows me, I can talk when I'm left to it...
So to find myself in a position where I the very words I use on here and both around my friends just escapes me when I'm around her is quite comical and just a little bit sad (ED - surely you can spare some sympathy for him feeling like this, right?)!
So to find myself in a position where I the very words I use on here and both around my friends just escapes me when I'm around her is quite comical and just a little bit sad (ED - surely you can spare some sympathy for him feeling like this, right?)!
Oh the irony, oh the freakin' irony!
So, with all that being said, how do I go about applying what I'm talking about here?
I know that, unlike Saul, I don't need to try and come up with a solution that will help me break this shyness around this person. God has it all in hand and in allowing it to linger (ED - as if he's not said that enough already yet!), it is clearly working this way for a reason.
Yes I know that I am giving it more power by actually admitting it is there, so maybe that's a mistake on my part. The point is, I don't care who knows anymore!
That's not something I ever thought I would say because I've been running away from my feelings for this young lady for some time now. Running away because I've never felt like this about anyone before... NEVER!!!
But now the running stops!
It ends!
I have to keep my eyes fixed upon Jesus, the Author and Perfector of my faith because He clearly is up to something if He's allowing this to overwhelm me repeatedly despite my attempts to give it up/over to Him every single day!
No temptation has seized you beyond what people normally experience, and God can be trusted not to allow you to be tempted beyond what you can bear. On the contrary, along with the temptation He will also provide the way out, so that you will be able to endure. 1 Corinthians 10:13 (CJB) emphasis added
I just love that verse!
The way it puts it that God can be trusted "not to allow you" is a wonderful testament to His true nature that no matter what I'm facing, He is right there with me, just like He was with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego: -
Suddenly King Nebuchadnezzar jumped up in alarm and said, “Didn’t we throw three men, bound hand and foot, into the fire?” “That’s right, O king,” they said. “But look!” he said. “I see four men, walking around freely in the fire, completely unharmed! And the fourth man looks like a son of the gods!” Daniel 3:24:25 (MSG) emphasis added
So if He helped them survive the fiery furnace, then He can absolutely help me in my present dilemma!
What I want you all to take from this is that, even though I'm opening up to a completely unheard of level of vulnerability for me, God is for you and He wants good things for you!
Sometimes, though, you will have to go through the trial to get the reward that comes at the end of it.
So keep looking up, knowing that He's there, smiling down upon you and knows that with the Spirit working inside of you, you are able to do all things!
Watch the skies!
Final Thought
What I want you all to take from this is that, even though I'm opening up to a completely unheard of level of vulnerability for me, God is for you and He wants good things for you!
Sometimes, though, you will have to go through the trial to get the reward that comes at the end of it.
So keep looking up, knowing that He's there, smiling down upon you and knows that with the Spirit working inside of you, you are able to do all things!
Watch the skies!
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